Uneasiness

I don't know why. I have a feeling in my gut like I have never had before, and no it isn't Mom's casserole. They announced a couple days ago that Brian Clades was dead due to complications arising from a series of infections. I and everyone else I know have a serious problem with that. Brian Clades is a NexGen, his immune system kills everything. I once heard that a NexGen had contracted the HIV virus from a crazy night out. One week later he was clean.

That gets the old libido going, doesn't it? Haha! Look amazing, have all the sex appeal you could want, intelligent, beautiful, and you can safely go out and do anyone you want without fear of contracting Syphilis or even AIDS. It's kind of scary. I wonder how potent their gametes are. Imagine a little sperm with a turboprop engine and a head like a spear point.

I sure hope Mom doesn't read this. Mom, if you are reading this I want you to keep in mind that I am 17 and have the hormones that come with it. Just know that I am clean and I respect women just like you taught me.

I feel better now, thinking of things like that. I once had a buddy who slept with a girl. Afterward he had some serious conscience problems. He said he felt like a damned soul in hell. I thought that was funny since all the idiots you see on television have sex with each other and think nothing of it come the next day. It changed him horribly. He started doing drugs. I haven't seen him in a few months. Anyway I have no interest in compromising my virtue, as secure as it seems.

The buzz today in school was about the sudden closing of the Olympics. They just declared an end to it, not even a closing ceremony, and sent all the athletes home. I see a huge problem with that. Don't you?

But hey, that's panic mode, right? Human nature. When the proverbial crap hits the fan we are talking stupidity en masse. Let us say that this Olympic horror comes home, let's say it gets wildly out of hand. Sure disease, lack of sanitation, and the collapse of infrastructure can kill people. But that's only the catalyst.

I read something once where some life coach guru gave a formula. It was Event + Response = Outcome. E + R = O. So Event - collapse of infrastructure, martial law, what have you. Response - people being stupid. Equals Outcome - people die. I just have the worst feeling about this, I can't relax, I'm not sleeping.

Just seeing Brian collapse like that, then tear someone's throat out. The blood. At that last moment it seemed to make him go into more of a frenzy. I'll admit it's huge on YouTube, and I've watched it a dozen times.

If that was him.

Was it him?